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We wound up using a custom-built chatbot that someone purpose-built for the game. The bot is an "emergency stop button".

Any player can, at any time, anonymously press a "STOP" button on a third-party site hooked up to the bot. The bot then posts a chat message along the lines of "STOP: The emergency stop button has been pressed." Once the button has been pressed, it requires all participants of the game to press a "Continue" button, with the presses again kept anonymous, after which it posts a "Continue" message to the chat room.

This allows anyone to immediately stop the game if they feel uncomfortable without revealing themselves as the one who did so if they don't want to. A conversation can then happen about what lines were crossed and how to keep everyone comfortable before resuming. The game can't resume if someone doesn't feel comfortable enough to press the continue button.